She, oh she...

She
May be the face I can't forget
The trace of pleasure or regret
May be my treasure or the price I have to pay
She
May be the song that summer sings
May be the chill that autumn brings
May be a hundred different things
Within the measure of a day

She
May be the beauty or the beast
May be the famine or the feast
May turn each day into a heaven or a hell
She may be the mirror of my dreams
The smile reflected in a stream
She may not be what she may seem
Inside her shell

She
Who always seems so happy in a crowd
Whose eyes can be so private and so proud
No one's allowed to see them when they cry
She
May be the love that cannot hope HAVE to last
May come to me from shadows of the past
That I'll remember till the day I die

She
May be the reason I survive
The why and wherefore I'm alive
The one I'll care for through the rough and ready years
Me
I'll take her laughter and her tears
And make them all my souvenirs
For where she goes I've got to be
The meaning of my life is

She
She, oh she

The Mayonnaise Jar and 2 Cups of Coffee

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was. The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was. The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar.

Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous yes." The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

"Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided, "I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things -- your God, family, your children, your health, your friends, and your favourite passions -- things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house, and your car.

The sand is everything else -- the small stuff."

"If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued, "there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls."

The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.

Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups.

Take your partner out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal. Take care of the golf balls first -- the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented.

The professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend."

fm's tots: do u think the above is true? is there really "always room"? esp with finals coming up, i seriously doubt so. regardless, nice story to be shared.

Tak Giu - The Short Film

"Tak Giu" (15mins, Singlish/with English subtitles) is an indie film which follows the journey of 3 soccer-crazy boys. Having taken up the challenge of a friendly soccer match, the boys realise that it is not easy to find a good, free public soccer field in Singapore... if there's any at all. Through their journey they encounter obnoxious care-takers, locked-up fences, deterring weather and a persistent policeman. Will they be able to find their dream soccer pitch?
Watch Tak Gui @ http://www.wirelessed.net/takgiu/

Grocery Store Wars

Cuke Skywalker (cucumber) fighting it out with Lord Tader (russet potato)

this video clip is real funny. check it out @ Organic Store Wars http://www.storewars.org/

darlings @ the beaches

darlings @ pacific beach, san diego


Charming beauty, contemplating the world.




Coronado Beach.

Coronado Island, located directly across the bay from downtown San Diego, is an ideal vacation destination. Continually recognized for its expansive white beaches, Coronado was recently voted the number two beach in America and the number one family beach by the Travel Channel.

Exam Schedule for Fall 2005 (tentative)

POLI 13. Power and Justice
--- Monday Dec. 5 8:00 - 11:00 a.m.
BIMM 116. Circadian Rhythms-Bio Clocks
--- Tuesday Dec. 6 11:30 - 2:30 p.m.
BIMM 100. Molecular Biology
--- Wednesday Dec. 7 7:00 - 10:00 p.m.
JAPN 10A. Japanese Studies
--- Thursday Dec. 8 8:00 - 11:00 a.m.
BIBC 103. Biochemical Techniques Laboratory
--- Friday Dec. 9 11:30 - 2:30 p.m

crazy?

Notice: Switching to Exam Mode with Immediate Effect

i'm terribly screwed for structural biochem (literally slept thru 3 weeks of lectures).
i'm behind on readings for CAT (2 weeks worth). i have an essay proposal due on Monday.
i haven't paid much attention to PSYC 60: Statistics cuz i think its too easy. now, i have no idea how to do any type of the 3 t-tests and why. just started listening today for two-way chi-squared tests.
just had a econs midterms yesterday. have no idea how i did. its prob my best subject as of now.

in short. im screwed. switching to exam mode with immediate effect.
ie. chao mug all the way till finals in 2 weeks time.

oh shit. its gonna be a thrill ride all the way...

msn conversation excerpt

an excerpt from a MSN conversation i had today. read and judge for yourself my reaction...

11:09:37 AM fm to Mr.X: btw, can we split informing everyone abt tonight?
11:10:03 AM fm to Mr.X: lets put tentative details 1130pm at ihouse
11:10:14 AM Mr.X to fm: and ?
11:10:38 AM fm to Mr.X: we'll gather at ihouse, and we'll go over to sy's place together
11:10:46 AM fm to Mr.X: is that ok?
11:10:52 AM Mr.X to fm: ok..anyway me going to nap now...ttyl

and Mr.X promptly disappeared offline before 11:11:00.

wtf. wat else can i say...

this is a referral. i didnt say anything ok!

i did not say anything ok! i point you pple to other sites can already:
mr brown: Scared the World Don't Know
pls dont sue me. really. pls. don't.

p/s: Google News search (wonder if i'll ever get this (in)famous)

Tong Hua MTV taken down.

darn. its been a bad week alright.

i've taken down the Tong Hua MTV and mp3. There was 229 downloads of the MTV 2 weeks ago, 210 downloads last week and 61 downloads since Sunday (SGT) till the time of this post. A grand total of 500 downloads exactly.

Your site randomtots.com has exceeded its bandwidth quota in the period beginning on 2005-05-01.
Your quota is set to 5368709120 bytes ( 5120.0 MB ), and your site has consumed 443772603 bytes ( 423.215 MB ) beyond that quota.

I cannot tahan liaoz. My hosting is not meant to be used so heavily. pray for me that I do not have to pay for the extra bandwidth, or that this site will be down for the rest of the month.

in addition, the increase in downloads was not reflected in the site traffic (which i constantly monitor). thus, if i find out that someone passed the direct link to the download to friends, im gonna kill that person.

u can pray for that person too...

i cry for the world...

have you ever experienced the feeling of true despair?
to lose all hope. completely overcomed by a sense of futility and defeat. when you feel that nothing you do can ever help the situation. no matter how hard you try, how well you work, how chao bia you strive, how little you sleep, nothing goes into your head anymore.

have you ever experienced the feeling of true loneliness?
the sudden awareness of the lack of companions by your side, at a time when you needed them most. when you feel that its you vs the world. isolated. forsaken. abandoned. with no one to talk to. no one to console you. and no one who can console you.

human beings evolved through a culture of herd behavior. but it seems that the old habits dont apply in the new world anymore. cultures come and go. will solitary individuals be the norm of the future? when we finally abandon the false face of "love, friendship and kindness". to express the individualism and selfishness that is in the fundamental logic of our dimension.

as our society "advanced" onwards to "modern times", and as more members struggle to adapt society to their new standards, will they succeed? if the new world order is about "me and me alone"...

... i cry not only for myself. i cry for the world...

when even the moon hides from u... (0330)

i slept like a fetus last night. curled up knees to chin, hugging my legs. lying on my soft fleece bedsheet, pillowless, covered by my big warm blanket.

i felt like a baby last night. alone. frightened. not knowing who i am, what i am, where i came from, where i was going. and perhaps, most imptly, why am i here?

i tot hard. and came up empty. vague memories of the past flashed through my broken mind. smiles, sadness, dinners, talk, games, work. like random scenes from a broken DVD player. teasing, taunting. u know it me u knoe it me not.

temptations come and go. responsibilities stick worse than chewing gum. why wasnt responsibilities banned from the utopian state?

i must have made a mistake somewhere. someone up there must have made a mistake somewhere. im not me. im not meant to be here. they must have grabbed the wrong guy, the wrong soul.

i do not belong here. that much is clear. but the restraints are too strong. link or die. social constructs are made to control. like me. against my will. to follow or risk discard.

i dream. i laugh. i lust. i love. and i cry. i wanna be who i am. but will u let me?